Wonder Park – Review

What can be best describe as a descent into sheer madness, Nickelodeon’s Wonder Park is anything but a pleasant experience. From the same animation studio who produced the Academy Award Winning Rango (which was just merely produced less than a decade ago), it’s almost downright questionable how awful and contrived Wonder Park ended up being. From a hyper-realistic smartly written Western, to an off-the-walls cringe fest of epic proportions, it’s disgraceful to see what became of this film and it’s famed down-on-it’s luck production house. The production story of Wonder Park is even more unpleasant than what the film ended up being. With various allegations of sexual misconduct from the creator of the film, David Feiss, Paramount decided to just pull the rug, and leave the production directionless. LITERALLY. It’s even more dumbfounding that they couldn’t even pull off an Alan Smithee, but that’s besides the point. Wonder Park, with or without a director is derivative garbage for the youth of today. Have fun taking selfies kids!

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Stored with piles upon piles of undeveloped ideas, every single tedious element, including the most basic of morals and messages is over simplified to a certain unfathomable degree. A film so irresponsibly dull and lifeless, within its countless minutes of computer generated fireworks and zombie monkey plush dolls, that it almost feels like (just like the toys/plush dolls mentioned) the film was raised from the dead. May Satan be nice to us, because 86 minutes of hellish “entertainment” may be too strenuous for some parents! This godforsaken curse obviously includes the dreadful use of shot composition and editing, with plenty of uncomfortable extreme closeups and cuts, that could just as well make John Ottman (the “acclaimed” editor behind the shit-fest that was Bohemian Rhapsody) scream with pure delight.

It’s insatiable that Paramount could have invested millions into this product, without any focus or clear idea of what they were putting their money into. Regardless of the all-star cast, or the at-times visually stunning lighting and location models, the production of this film is surely going to be a tainted mark in all of these actors and animators careers. It’s embarrassing that such mediocrity could be wasted so shamelessly. Sometimes profit isn’t as important as dignity, and I hope all who’ve experienced the production of this film could take this life lesson for granted.

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Let it be known that at the end of the day, we go to the movies to be transported into a different world, a different place with different characters, that can enchant and amuse use. Wonder Park fails in doing so. Although it may have some interesting ideas sprinkled throughout, Wonder Park will leave you rolling your eyes throughout it’s dreadful run-time. Older children won’t laugh, because they’ve seen it before, with each joke and story beat. Younger Children won’t even understand the film, due to it’s nonsensical logic. So what’s the point of watching this film, if there’s barely anything to take away from it to begin with. Just see Mirai Of The Future instead, which is obviously a much more worthy investment and joyful experience than what Wonder Park could have ever accomplished, with or without a director at the helm.

Wonder Park is Now Playing Nationwide

 

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